Being a newlywed is like being a sugar, these cancerous ants can't resist the urge to come at you.

Recently I bumped into some posts of my hi school friend getting married on Facebook.

Some of my known respected people commented on her lovely day memories saying stuff like "Oh I have waited to eat your nasi minyak so long," or "Maybe she didn't remember us anymore,".

Also, the same thing happened to me, when an acquaintance met me in another wedding, asking "when did you get married? you didn't invite me, why huh?" and I can only give the primary excuse, "I don't have the budget to do so,". I am saying this is an excuse eventho its a fact, but even someone close to me saying its an excuse. lel. The catering wasn't on me leh, please remember this. I don't have the privilege to invite all, I should be mindful of my parents money loh.

So where is this going eh syuk?

From here, the ranting starts.

First of all,

Inviting people is solely in the hand of the organisor.

We, the invited, have no rights to be invited unless they think so.

Its like, you are having a gala dinner for your batchmates.

And you are not inviting the school staff because, this is a gala dinner for batchmates, not batchmate+school staff.

BUT the school staff felt like they have the right to be invited because the previous batch did.

Do you get what I'm saying?

Second,

People these days don't get marry with enormous budget unless they have worked several years or got some sponsors from people around them.

We, the people who would really like to see them in their wedding dress, eat their food and have fun at their wedding, should understand that the wedding is just one day event.

They should not feel burdened to be inviting all the people they know.

They should have the ease of mind, the joy before and after or during the wedding.

Just because they need to invite us, they need to rack up some cents from their lawn or even childhood piggy banks.

Have you felt the burden and expectations they are having in order to host a wedding?

I did, and I am saying this based on my experience.

Third,

Be mindful and have a great way of thinking.

When you noticed someone's married and they didn't invited you,

please, I plead to you, please be mindful on the next words and reaction you are giving them.

"Aku baru nak merasa nasi minyak kau."

"Wah kau, lupa kawan nampak."

"Sampai hati tak jemput kita."

These are not the best and they really do have big effect on the newlyweds.

Bad effect.

How should you handle this brother or sister?

With a smile on your face, say "Congratulations! I didn't know that you guys got married! So happy for you guy!"

And if you want to cushion your feelings of not getting invited, ask few more questions.

"Eh, when did you get married?"

"Sorry I didn't come to your wedding, but I believe it was a grand one eh haha."

"So how's life now? Sure things are different now eh. So happy lah for you guys!"

Related to number three, fourth is on the bad reaction.

Saying all those bad words, only do negative effects on the newlyweds.

They might feel sad for not being able to show you that you are important to them.

Or their pride scarred because not having the capacity to invite ALL people he/she knew.

Even if they are being so detailed, they might have lose track on you, so they forgot to invite you.

Thus, making their heart and mind worry too much about how their relationship with you will deterred, when what they should be feeling are happy and joy.

AGAIN.

The host have the privilege to invite who they want, we don't.

Budget by this economic period is like a cramp, so tight. Period.

Be mindful on being uninvited, we have no privilege to feel left out, unless you are being selfish.

Bad reactions bring bad feelings to the newlyweds, when all they should receive from you are encouragement and good prayers.

***

You know, I do hope and pray for all of my friends to have the capability to invite me to their weddings.
I might feel sad if wasn't invited, but I believe they have more things and reasons to not invite more than I have to be invited.
For this peeps, just don't get disheartened with people not inviting you.

I got into a soured relationship with a very close friend of mine,
and we are never close anymore since then.
Its now only some comments on socmed, never did I have the chance to meet him anymore.
Grieves and regrets are all that I got after the mistake I did.

And its all for being too childish on silly stuff.
Yes.

I do say being sad for not being invited IS a childish stuff.

The end.